The Special-ism.com site has a blog entry by Janice O'Leary titled, "5 More Quick Tips to Deal with Inappropriate Acting Out Behaviour" which I found was a great help to me with some of the students in my classroom.
While I don't believe in "talking-over" students that are intent on interrupting while you are trying to communicate with sentences that start with "I see that...," "I noticed....," etc., I like to create calm in the room by playing with a toy - even just a marker and rolling it on the table to gain or re-direct their interest from the behavior being displayed by acting out. Sometimes the simple act of sitting close by and rolling a marker on a table and not talking will generate a new interest and/or curiosity.
After gaining their attention I really like items four and five from Ms. O'Leary's blog entry:
"4. Do, not say. Children pay more attention and learn from what adults do than from what they say. If you want your child to be polite, then you must be polite. You cannot expect your child to be non-aggressive when you are fighting with your neighbor.
Yelling “Calm down” at your child will not work, you have to show the child how to behave. Being disrespectful to a child solves nothing, you only teach them that this behavior is acceptable in your family. You must be composed. “I do not like it when you call me names like this.” Then calmly walk away.
Model the behavior you want to see in your child. Show them how to handle frustrations. “I am very upset with the way you spoke to me”, then walk away. Don’t just say “you need to be polite.” Show them in your everyday life how to be polite.
5. Accept bad moods and bad days. Everyone has bad days. This coupled with your child’s difficulty with problem solving and communicating can lead to major arguments. Sometimes people are just not morning people. If you recognize this, you can avoid fights by having an established routine with less communication. Breakfast, get dressed, off to school.
You can accept a bad mood by saying, “It looks like you are having a bad day, lets chat in ten minutes.” Bad moods are okay, you can accept them and say “I know your team lost and you are upset, just take it easy tonight.” But if the bad mood leads to your child to taking out their anger on you and it escalates into disrespectful, rude or obnoxious behavior, that is not okay.
You say “I am sorry you are having a bad day, but don’t take it out on me.” Then walk away. Remember to disconnect."
Please read the entire blog post here: http://special-ism.com/5-more-quick-tips-to-deal-with-inappropriate-acting-out-behaviour/
And a special thanks to all of the great writers at Special-ism.com for providing great information and strategies for all of our students.
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